A woman in stilettos

"What makes you the woman you are today?"

She walked with confidence through the sea of men who had their eyes trained on her. Her eyes showed no intimidation. Her smile was relaxed. Her walk was strong. Her breathing was labored.

Her brain on the other hand, was another story. For a young, healthy woman such as her, no one would guess that she was more than just a pretty face. She had a history of blood clot removals from her brain. If she trusted you enough, she'd part her hair just enough to show you where the scar ran deep in her skull. But on her usual days, she'd cover it up with her heavy mass of brown locks.

Now she stood in her black stilettos. All eyes were still on her. I don't think anyone in the room would mind if she hadn't spoken, they would just be content with admiring her head-to-toe beauty. But she began to speak...


"I am the woman I am today because I believed in God; because I believed in salvation; because I believed in redemption; because I believed in me."

She... she was a woman in stilettos. So, next time you see a woman in stilettos, don't be too quick to judge. She could just be holding her head up high, like the rest of us women out there. And maybe, just maybe, the stilettos she's wearing gives her the confidence she needs to conquer the world.

Stiletto Tuesday, here I come!;)

Contentment

So, pictures of couples on tumblr don't bother me anymore. Take a wild guess why...

My priorities are straight. I'm on track with all my assignments and homework. My family relationships can't be any better or stronger. I'm trying my best to be a good friend to anyone and everyone who needs me.

I am responsible.
And very, very happy :)



Contentment
: 'acknowledgement and satisfaction of reaching capacity.' The level of capacity reached may be sought after, expected, desired, or simply predetermined as the level in which provides contentment.

I'm content. I've reached my level of contentment. Now, I just hope it lasts for a long, long time.


In the meantime, you've got to watch this :) This is only the trailer but if you try hard enough, you can find the full film online.

I miss you, mummy. Now more than ever. I was just reminded again how you're constantly watching over me. Thank you. I love you, mummy <3

Hello February

Hello :) January was rough, but it ended well. That means a good start for February :)

"I want you back."

The only lyrics I needed to understand. But slow and steady this time. Very slow and very steady.

All this princess needs is a peasant's kiss.
<3

Mind made up

The desk where you sit inside of a frame made of
Made of, of wood
I keep those chopsticks you had from when you taught abroad
Taught abroad in Japan

I love it all
So much I call
I want you back, back, back
You back

I did not know you as well as my father
Father knew you
Every question you took the time to sit and look it up
Look it up in the encyclopedia

I love it all
So much I call
I want you back, back, back
You back

I love it all
So much I call
I want you back, back, back
You back, yeah

It sounds like we would've had a great deal to say
To say to each other
I bet when I leave my body for the sky the wait
The wait will be worth it

I love it all
So much I call
I want you back, back, back
You back

I love it all
So much I call
I want you back, back, back
You back


Sam says : "You'll never know unless you try. But always remember the fine line. Don't lose yourself. And know your boundaries."

Matt 16:26 - "And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul? Is anything worth more than your soul?"

Take these things away

I Want Someone To Know
My Favorite Ice Cream
I Want Someone To Laugh
When I Act Like I'm Thirteen
I Need Someone To Stay
'Til I Can Fall Asleep
Make being Awake Like Living In A Dream

And At The End Of Everyday No One Can Take These Things Away
We All Want Love And That's Okay
Maybe There's Someone
'Cause when My Song Has Slipped Away
And The Darkness Swallows The Day
Well another One's Not Very Far Away

So Baby Just Hold
Baby Just Hold On

I Want Somewhere To Go

When It's Too Noisy In My Head
Verbal vertigo I Want To Hear My Voice Instead
I Need Some Way To Lose

This Fear Of Falling Down
'Cause I Can Still Dance

When My Feet Are On The Ground

And At The End Of Everyday No One Can Take These Things Away
We All Want Love And That's Okay
Maybe There's Someone
'Cause when My Song Has Slipped Away
And The Darkness Swallows The Day
Well another One's Not Very Far Away

So Baby Just Hold
Baby Just Hold On

If you could see behind my eyes
Indigo and ivory
Overwhelmed in outer space
Spinning round and round and chasing
Fairy tales and shooting stars
How I wonder where we are
In this life we'll be alright
All we gotta do is hold on tight

And At The End Of Everyday No One Can Take These Things Away
We All Want Love And That's Okay
Maybe There's Someone
'Cause when My Song Has Slipped Away
And The Darkness Swallows The Day
Well another One's Not Very Far Away

So Baby Just Hold
Baby Just Hold On

When My Song Has Slipped Away
And The Darkness Swallows The Day
Another One's Not Very Far Away

So Baby Just Hold

Just Hold On

Hold On

Carrying a princess

"I believe a dude must always be able to carry his girlfriend."

"If you throw yourself at me, I'll know what to do."

"Stop running, princess."

"Miss me, ah?"

"You like me."

"Aren't you gonna kiss me?"


I remembered everything you said to me, peasant. Guess why?

A princess without her tiara

A part of me knows you're worth it, peasant. Please don't make me regret everything I've said and done. Because I meant every word. I meant every kiss. I meant it. My tiara may be falling but who cares? The only princess I wanna be right now is yours. I was only ever your princess.

Remember the times I said, "I'm not a princess"? What I meant was, I'm YOUR princess.

I'd rather be a princess without her tiara than a princess without her peasant. Someday, I hope to be a princess with her peasant prince. But I know I'm getting a little ahead of myself here. Not only am I a princess, I'm also a dreamer. Don't forget that, peasant.

Unfinished kiss

She walked up to him; and with a kiss, told him everything she felt for him. Things she couldn't express through words alone, but through the sacred meaning of a kiss. She'd been wanting to do this for a while. So much had transpired in the past month. Too many heartbreaking memories, actions and exchanged words. She didn't want to think anymore. She did what she'd been wanting to do. She gave him her one and only first kiss.

"Don't run from me. Just, don't. I know how you feel about me, even if you don't know it yet. Make me this promise. 'No emotional running'. Can you do that for me, princess?"

She shouldn't have agreed. Because she kept that promise. And that promise is coming back to haunt her. Instead of doing her usual run from emotions, she stayed. She fought. She wanted what she wanted. Him. Now she's starting to doubt if he really wants her. So, she kissed him.

To be continued...

Catch me?

Maybe, just maybe, this one's for me.

Question is,
"Do I want to be caught?"

No thinking

I don't want to be your challenge. I don't want to be the girl you're fixated on. It's too much. You say, "No pressure", but there is pressure...ON ME! I may be the one putting weight on my shoulders, but it's all for good reason. You're not only perfect on paper, you're perfect in person too. When you open your mouth, you say all the right things. At least I think you're saying the right things. But to me, they could possibly be all the wrong things.

"What part of 'I'm not ready', don't you understand?"

I'm just tapping into all the negative sides of me right now.

You know I'm a runner. You know I've never been able to commit to anything serious. I've never had to, really. I live my life taking each day as it comes. You just had to stop me in my tracks and make me start my habit or over thinking again. I hate thinking. I hate it!

My brain is so damn frazzled right now... I can't tell what I'm feeling! When you ask, "Do you like me?" I ask my feelings, and they don't have an answer. I am serious. I can't even tell if I like someone right now! It's never been this tough. It's a yes or no question. Simple right? NOT!

UGGHHHHHHH!!!!!

I know you're not forcing me to do anything. But you are forcing me to face a truth I may not want to face yet. No, I DON'T want to face yet. Are you really sure I won't end up just hurting you one day to the point you can't even look at me anymore? Are you 100% sure I'm not just leading you on?

Cause I could very well be leading you on, and I've told you this from the start. You and I really don't have much in common. As it is, you and I see this "thing" we have going in different directions. You say you're the positive one, and I'm the negative one. But there's more to it. Why am I the negative one? Maybe it's cause I know I can't reciprocate whatever feelings you have for me. You say, "That's now, what about later?"

I just...don't want to think about it!!



I think I'm done ranting for the day.

It's worth it

Started my first official college class today:) It was both intimidating and exciting. In the end, all went well. Despite being sick and using up 3 whole packets of tissue, I made it!

"The effort you put in is worth it, I promise you. Just wait and see..."

Still praying hard no really big hardships come my way. I know I can't control God's plan, but I can always pray for his guidance. I'm still 100% sure he won't throw something my way I can't handle. I want to face my challenges headstrong.

I miss you, mum. See where I am now? See what I'm doing? I sure do hope you're proud of me.

I'm laughing, aren't you?

I don't even know who I'm mad at, besides myself that is. I hear screams coming at me from all around. What kind of nightmare is this???? The worst kind, that's what.

"You can't do this, Sam. You're nothing but a waste of flesh and bones."

That is the summary of what I'm hearing.

I AM NOT SUICIDAL! I AM NOT GONNA END MY LIFE BECAUSE YOU CAN'T SEEM TO APPRECIATE MY EXISTENCE!

One day, I'll be really done with you. With ALL of you!

Blasting these songs of hate is not helping, but it's the only music I can bear hearing at the moment. Is the question "WHY?" even valid?

What did I do to ever hurt you? I gave you all I had. All my blood and sweat. I'll tell you what you gave me. You gave me hell. You put disgusting words into my mouth to make me look like the devil on earth. I put on a mask of an angel for you, your friends, your family. Not good enough for you? Well, I'm sorry. Let me take it all back and be the your worst nightmare. Because you have no idea what I'm capable of.

When I walk out that front door with my suitcase in hand, you'll know exactly what you've lost. Me. That's what you would've lost. I know you won't care now. But just wait and see what happens to your life. The walls around you will crumble and you'll be buried in your incapability to accept someone you raised. Now, isn't that amusing?


I'm laughing, aren't you?